The Moment When…

“After John [the Baptist] had been arrested…”  Wow, John has just been arrested and Jesus decided that now is the time to begin his ministry—really? It is in this atmosphere that we see Jesus calling Simon and Andrew, James and John away from their nets, their boats, their livelihood, for James and John, even father, to follow him, and they go.  Have they not heard about John’s arrest?

Saying that we are all called to…something seems to reduce the impact.  To be called by God is an important moment.  The moment when you know the Divine eye is on you.  I wonder what the Apostles felt when Jesus looked each of them.  Did the feel that moment?  The moment when you knew, in all creation, God sees you, loves you, and calls you saying “Come, follow me”.  Jesus’ message, the Gospel (good news) “the Kingdom of God is at hand”.  Oh yeah, and God wants YOU to tell everyone.

My memories are so vivid.  Everything in me knew that God saw me.  There was a strange mix of excitement and terror.  I, like Mary, wondered at the mere possibility that God would even notice me let alone call me to him, would consecrate me for something much greater than myself.  Was this what the apostles felt in that moment?  The apostles do not seem to have any of these reservations, not even in the political context of their time.  They abandoned everything.

My heart soared when I made the appointment with our Vocation Director. Back then, I shook with fear as I traveled to speak with her.  I knew with all my being I am called by God.  I feared human rejection though.  What would my family say?  What if the Sister thinks this is a bad idea?  What if…?  I had none of the abandon the Apostles exhibited.  That moment of knowing is what sustains my commitment.

The Kingdom of God is at hand.  And God does call all of us to…something. Is this your moment?

Ana Cloughly, OSB